Armageddon hockey, player of the game

Yesterday the world was supposed to end. Or at least the Mayans thought so. And the Hannover Indians decided to run with that theme for last night's game against the Ice Pirates (Eispiraten) of Crimmitschau. (I have never heard of Crimmitschau, and I'm told there's not much to do there except be an Ice Pirate fan.) They had new jerseys for the occasion. On the back was a picture of the Hannover Rathaus with fireballs descending on it from the sky. The zamboni had "the end of the world" written on it in tape, and little kids dressed in plastic haz-mat suits were skating around to pick up the pucks. Even with the time zone difference (I figured that noon Mayan time would be about 7pm here), by the start of the hockey game we all still existed, which was reason enough to try and win a hockey game. They did, by the way. After a slow start, the Indians won 4 to 3.

The most exciting play of the game, though, was performed by me. That's right - me. The second period had just ended and our friend Kent and I (Kent is a Canadian, PE teacher, and former Indians player who was formerly known as Kent Todd, Ice Hockey God) went to get beers. I walked back to the stands, a cup in each hand. Heading for the bleachers, right along the edge of the rink, I stepped around a man who was standing in front of the stairs. I had, however, stepped on to the place where the zamboni rolls out and drags some ice onto the floor. My left foot slipped. I wobbled, then recovered, then the right foot slipped. I felt myself going down, slowly, and lifted both hands over my head, hoping to save the beers, if not my dignity. They sloshed forward, then backward, and as my butt hit the floor they each let out a small frothy splash (landing on my hat and my sleeve), and stayed largely intact.

Kent grabbed me under the armpits and helped me up after safely setting his beers aside, and the first aid guys ran over to ask if I was ok. I was absolutely ok, and told Brian confidently that yes, I had fallen on my backside like a klutz, but I hardly spilled any beer. He beamed with pride. I think we even high fived. I wonder if anyone got it on camera - we could have had an instant replay, except the Indians don't have a sophisticated enough scoreboard for that.

The world did not end last night. I did not spill the beer. And if Armageddon ever comes during a second-league hockey game in Germany, I want to be riding in the zamboni.